I've been having these visions when I fall deeper into my meditation. Everything ceases to exist. Around me is dust—the desert.
The room I'm in is the only thing which remains of my previously known physical world, but it roofless and without walls. The sun shines bright on me—it feels like a spotlight.
The sounds of everyday are still there. The matatus honk, but there is no road. My neighbours speak, but there are no houses. The crows caw in an empty sky.
Last night I dreamt of this desert. I was merging with it and was afraid of its vacancy. I felt myself stretch across the dryness, collecting all knowledge of rock and sand. Awake, I realise that there is no reason to be afraid. And to dissolve into nothingness, is something I have longed for.